


Speechless

by ryanhasao3



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood & Manga
Genre: Blind Roy Mustang, Bottom!Roy Mustang, Edward Elric Swears, Flirting, Fluff and Smut, Implied/Referenced Underage Sex, M/M, Mild Smut, Post-Canon, Top!Edward Elric, so as ed is 17 here its legal, technically amestrian age of consent is 15
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-19
Updated: 2018-06-20
Packaged: 2019-05-25 16:50:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 9,559
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14981408
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ryanhasao3/pseuds/ryanhasao3
Summary: It had been almost two years since Roy had seen Edward Elric and a lot had changed since the Promised Day. Being blind now may have set him back a little in his career path, but he was damned if he'd let it affect his personal life too.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this a while ago - around the same time as Sweet 16 and Confessions - so my typo sensing skills are still limited although I have done my best. I was experimenting with the idea that maybe since Roy has so much authority at work and everywhere else, maybe he wanted to let go a little in his personal life. Who knows? I hope you enjoy it! Still un-beta'd but I don't plan on getting one since it's mostly typos I struggle with.

Roy knew it had been a while since he'd seen the shorty but it was the first weekend off he'd managed to get in almost two years and he was insistent on seeing him before he left for Creta and further West. His job as Brigadier General under Fuhrer Grumman was demanding at best and excessively exhausting at worst. Picking up the pieces after the coup had been difficult, but the country was finally starting to gather itself again and Roy felt a sense of pride at knowing he'd had a part in it. Now that he was beginning to receive easier, non-urgent work, he figured he could spare a weekend to see the former State Alchemist who'd saved the whole country, not to mention his own life. It was unfortunate that he'd needed to bring Hawkeye with him, but he couldn't guarantee he could get around entirely on his own, even with the higher sensitivities that came with his blindness; as much as he hated to admit it, he still wasn't entirely independent. It would be nice to see again, but he couldn't bring himself to sacrifice human souls for his own sake, even if Marcoh's stone was already pre-made. It seemed the shorty had rubbed off on him.

Sat on the train beside one of his closest friends, he closed his useless eyes and leant his chin on his closed fist. Only quiet chattering accompanied the low rumble of the train over the tracks, giving him a chance to consider the past year and a half. He and most of his crew had been promoted at least one rank, leaving him one step closer to becoming the Fuhrer. Fullmetal had retired shortly after leaving the hospital; giving up his alchemy made him unable to serve as a State Alchemist, and his refusal to serve in any other position sent him home to Resembool. Al had recovered and, the last he'd heard, was now preparing to visit his Xingese friends before travelling further East. He smiled as he thought. "Captain?"

"Yes, Sir?" He sat up straight and opened his eyes to turn his face in her general direction. He couldn't see her but he could picture her classic stony expression. He'd committed every tiny detail from before to his memory, allowing him to function almost the same, even without his sight. He'd spent so much time with her over the years that no matter how much either of them changed, he was always able to see her. Although he was sure he'd changed more than anyone else he knew - outside of the Elric brothers, that is. No one could change that much.

"Where are we now? And how far is there left to go?" he asked her, turning his face towards the window and then back to her. He missed watching the countryside roll by the most; the stretches of green soothed him even in his hardest times, and he now had to find another source of relaxation. He often settled for the sound of fire crackling beside him, but that was risky without anyone around as he couldn't always tell when it had risen too high. Small sacrifices, considering the circumstances.

"We're nearing the Resembool station, Sir. We should arrive within the hour. Were your plans to head straight to the Rockbell's or go to the hotel first?"

"The hotel," he answered, closing his eyes again and folding his arms across his chest, glad he'd decided not to wear his uniform. "I'd like to call before I visit, in case they're not in." It wasn't like him to be so considerate for the shorty, but it was the least he could do. The boy had sacrificed an arm and a leg for his brother, and then his alchemy. The least he could do was call before showing up on his doorstep.

* * *

He gritted his teeth against the bounce of the care as it hit another pothole. He couldn't predict when they'd come around, so even as a passenger, he was taken by shock each time his head was thrown against the low roof. He still wasn't sure why the State insisted on making them so low to the floor; he was not that tall but it still hurt. He hated to think what it must be like for Lieutenant Colonel Armstrong; even fully clothes he filled more space than was necessary.

"Are you alright, Sir?" the Captain asked him, pressing a hand against his shoulder to replace the concerned expression that was likely playing on her face. He smiled and nodded before turning away from the cold glass of the window. "Are you sure? You looked like you were in pain."

"It's just the potholes. They come as quite a shock to a blind man like me," he joked, facing what he could only guess was forwards. "I'm alright, Captain. I just hit my head, that's all. Are we close yet?"

He had been running over potential conversation points in his head over the course of the entire day and still had nothing to show for it. Nothing, outside the basic points, but he couldn't think of how to flesh them out. He knew he wanted to thank the brothers for saving his life. He wanted to congratulate them on getting their bodies back. He wanted to wish them luck. But he couldn't picture the links between each point. He was lost. As a man who was often brilliant with his words, thinking of what he would say to the shorty left him with only questions. Questions he couldn't begin to answer. Questions that maybe the runt could.

"We're nearly at the top of the hill now, Sir. Are you ready?"

There was another question he wasn't prepared to answer. Would he ever be ready to face that boy? Or did she mean, quite literally, was he ready to get out of the car? With everything going around in his head lately, he wasn't sure. "I'm as ready as I'll ever be," he settled with as the car slowed to a halt. He could faintly hear a dog barking as the Captain opened her door and began to walk around to help him out. He gritted his teeth yet again and opened it himself, feeling his boots sink into the thin glaze of mud that seemed to run over the entirety of Resembool. He'd never get used to life in the country; he was accustomed to smoke-filled alleys in Central. The Captain's hand rested against his forearm as he pushed the car door shut. She thanked the driver as he began to drive away - the action told him Hawkeye had already paid. 

A loud crash drew his attention as he turned his body in its direction. He could hear distant curses and the shocked gasp of the Captain before she quietly chuckled. His heart was racing as the noise was left unexplained, leaving him to grip the hand still resting against his arm. "What happened, Captain?" he asked in a mild panic. She released her hand and he heard the gravel crunch under the movement of her boots.

"I think Edward just fell off the roof, Sir."

"He  _what_?!"

"Colonel, is that you?"

Roy's ears perked up and he turned towards the direction of the voice, eyes still uselessly wide open in concern for the shorty's safety, although he felt relieved that nothing had changed over the last year and a half. He stopped for a second to consider the voice he'd recognised it from, frowning. "It's Brigadier General, now. Sorry, who is that?" he asked, unable to identify the person. He recognised the voice but it was different from his memories of it, and he struggled to attach a face.

"It's Alphonse."

He inhaled sharply and was aware of the shock on his face but couldn't recollect himself. That's why the voice sounded unusual and different. Not only what the younger Elric brother now two years older than the last he'd seen him, he'd only briefly met him after he got his own body back. The face he was trying to connect the voice to was long gone, attached to a broken armoured body that forced the voice to become echoed and distorted. "Nice to see... Well, nice to meet you again, Alphonse," he smiled, his heart-rate beginning to settle. He stuck out his hand and was only mildly surprised at the firm handshake he received. "I'm guessing that Fullmetal falling off the roof is a fairly regular occurrence since nobody seems concerned?"

"Oh, did he? Just as long as he didn't land on his leg this time, Winry left one hell of a bruise when she saw what he'd done to her handiwork last time," the boy laughed, and Roy was saddened by his inability to picture the smile on his face - he'd never actually seen it. The armour had been unforgiving. "Hey, Lieutenant. Has he been keeping you busy?"

"I've been promoted too, actually, to Captain," she answered, and he felt her eyes briefly fall on him. Memories of the celebration party flashed through his mind and he gritted his teeth in guilt as he tried to focus on the current events. The drunken crack in her voice after he'd turned her down had been difficult to take, almost as much as the genuinely shocked gasp when he followed it up with declaring himself homosexual. But that was a year ago, and they'd only grown closer as friends since then. "He's actually kept most of the work for himself, believe it or not."

"Oh, I believe it."

"Fullmetal, is that you?" Roy asked in response to the new voice, which had grown deeper over the time since they'd last met. He ignored the confusing shiver that ran down his spine at the low words, favouring a joke at the shorty's expense. "Did your voice finally break?" He laughed at the subsequent outcry and held up a hand to scratch an itch behind his ear. "It's just a joke, Fullmetal. I'm sure you must've grown a little since last time. You can't stay a runt forever, after all."

"He's actually taller than you, now, Sir," the Captain said, stopping him in his tracks as his smile dropped in surprise. "By how much, Edward?"

"Fuck, only by a couple inches," he replied. "I'm five foot ten." Roy stood in shock at the revelation. He couldn't believe that he was now shorter than the boy he'd referred to for over two years as 'shorty'. It was almost unbelievable. "But I'm not a child, either, before you resort to those jokes, Colonel. I'm eighteen this year. SO I guess that means you've got no more jokes left, huh, shorty?"

"Brigadier General," he answered, teeth still gritted as he tried to figure out exactly where Edward was stood so he could punch him.

"Nah, you're always Colonel to me. Let's go eat! HEY, WINRY! GUESS WHO'S HERE?!"

Roy started to move, trying to ignore the feeling that ran through him at Fullmetal's words. "Are you alright, Sir?"

"No, I'm... I'm fine," he answered, closing his eyes and walking in the direction she guided him. "I'm fine."

* * *

"I'll meet you at the car, Sir," the Captain said before he heard the now-familiar sound of gravel crunching beneath her feet. He then heard the distinct sound of the door closing behind him and turned in confusion before starting to step forward and open it again.

"Can, uh, can I show you something, Colonel?" Fullmetal said, making Roy stop and step back again, with a still-confused expression. He wasn't used to this serious note in the shorty's voice (he refused to stop calling him short while he had no proof that he'd grown). The whole evening had been filled with Winry's anger at Ed scratching his automail and the laughter of the two brothers, alongside the stony and judgemental silence of Captain Hawkeye. He was sure she knew what Roy had been thinking over the course of the last few hours, and wasn't looking forward to the conversation ahead of him where she was bound to remind him that Fullmetal was still under eighteen for the time being. "Well, not show, I guess. It's touch-friendly. It would need to be, in this light. But, uh, especially for... for you."

Roy frowned deeper before relaxing his face and opening his eyes, rubbing one hand over them as he nodded. His face had been racked with concern, shock and confusion since he'd gotten in that car from the hotel, and his facial muscles were starting to ache. "Okay. Turn about seventy degrees to your right and just keep walking until I say otherwise. Or, I guess... you can... uh, I guess you can hold my arm if you need to, I don't mi-"

"Fullmetal, I'm perfectly capable of listening to your footsteps," he interrupted, flinching at the unintentional harshness to his voice. "This gravel is helpful for a useless bastard like me," he joked, hoping to relieve the suspicious tension as he turned as recommended, starting to walk. The two were in a surprisingly comfortable silence as Edward led him to the end of the field behind the Rockbell residence. The sound of crickets chirping filled the air and Roy felt the crunching gravel beneath his feet turn to the soft squish of damp mud and grass. Even without seeing, he could tell he was in a beautiful countryside and he was sure Fullmetal would fit right in, his golden braid complimenting the bright green of the grass beneath their feet and-  _what on Earth am I thinking? He's only seventeen, it doesn't matter how beautiful his hair would look in low light or how smooth his voice is now it's dropped, and who cares that he's taller than me? I thought I'd gotten over this weird attraction to men taller than me, and he's not technically even a man yet and-_

"Here we are," the boy said, interrupting Roy's mental panic. He tried to steady his breathing, forcing himself to just focus on the situation around him. He'd learnt from Xingese researchers how to recognise the chi of people around him, and while he was far from perfect, he knew enough the closing his eyes told him that he and Fullmetal were the only people around. "Oh, I forgot. Have you got your gloves?"

"I don't need them anymore," he replied, clicking his bare fingers and creating a tiny flame hovering over them. "I could never get used to that clapping transmutation that you and Al used to do - it didn't feel natural to me - but my fingers still create the circle when I click as long as I position them right, so it works the same." He opens his palm and drops the flame, suddenly conscious of the way it would allow Fullmetal to see the low blush that had risen on his cheeks after the train of thought he'd accidentally gotten on only moments before. 

"Okay. Well," Fullmetal started, pausing and clearing his throat. Roy heard the soft squish of mud under his feet and stopped himself inhaling suddenly as he recognised the younger moving closer to him, his body heat obvious in the cold night-time air. "I've been... working on something for you. It's taken a while without alchemy, I had to carve it out by hand. Half the time I had to keep stopping to check it was accessible without seeing it. I don't envy your eyes, Colonel. But anyway," he paused again, stepping away. "Here it is. I covered it in wood chips so it wouldn't be discovered, but I thought it'd be a nice touch to have you burn them off." He heard the boy laugh lowly and ignored the effect his voice seemed to have on him. "Okay. If you turn a bit to the..." Roy rotated to the left, trying to guess based on where Fullmetal was stood. "No, that's... fuck it." He blinked in surprise as he felt the shorty's hands resting on his shoulders to manipulate his body, suddenly making him feel vulnerable. Maybe he should've brought the Captain with him to slap some sense into him for thinking like this. "Okay, straight ahead from you about... uh, a metre and a half? It's just wood chips and you're going to want to touch it after, so maybe throttle it a little, and uh-"

The shorty cut off as Roy clicked his fingers and followed the directions, swallowing at the sound of a gasp coming from Fullmetal. "How's that?" he asked, not dropping his hand in case he needs to do more. "Did I hit it?"

"Yeah, it's perfect. God, I'm glad I used wood chips instead of, like, magnesium or something. It's beautiful," he whispered in response, leaving Roy breathless as he feels the rising heat of his own flames just a metre away. He tried to control his expression, knowing it was visible in this light, but couldn't help wondering what Fullmetal had actually been doing.  _I can't believe he made something for me, with his own hands. This is insanity._ "Al and Winry said this was stupid, that I'd get it wrong or you'd laugh at me," he continued as Roy started to notice how close they actually were. "But I worked my arse off for this. I don't know how Winry has the energy to work on automail and metal without alchemy, this crap is exhausting."

"How long have you two been together?" Roy asked, stepping away slightly while dropping his hand so he can move closer to the flames. He loves the sound they make and it's nice to just stop and listen once in a while. He hears a choked laugh from Fullmetal and turns his face towards him. "What?"

"She's like a sister to me, Colonel," he laughs. "I've known her since I was tiny, dating her would be like dating Al, and that's just gross. No, I'm not with her. She's not exactly my type." Roy blinked and turned away before the relief on his face would give him away.  _This boy is seventeen. I am thirty-two. This can't happen. I mean, yeah, he's gotten attractive this past year and a half, but he's still under eighteen and even though the age of consent in Amestris is technically fifteen, it would be just plain creepy. He was my subordinate for two years. He saved my life. This can't happen. Ever._ "Colonel, are you okay? You've got a weird look on your face." Roy gritted his teeth and dropped his face before running one hand through his hair.

"No, I'm fine, Fullmetal. How's the fire? I'm ready to find out whatever this thing is. It'd better be worth it to warrant leaving the Captain at the car and wandering through a field at stupid o'clock," he joked, lifting his face and smiling in the younger's direction. 

"How long have you two been together?" Fullmetal parroted, shocking Roy into silence. "And don't give me all that rubbish about her being a subordinate, Colonel. The look on her face when I brought you out here tells me you're together." He closed his useless eyes and shook his head, turning around to face the shorty.

"She's just a close friend, Fullmetal. She's not really my type, either. And... there was a party a while ago," he explained, opening his eyes again and attempting to predict where to aim them. "She was drunk and misinterpreted our friendship. I shut her down. She's... she's not my type." He smiled thinly and remembered the sobs he'd hard that night and the bitter apologies the next morning.

"What is, Colonel? The women I ever saw you around were Madame Christmas' girls. So what is your type?"

"Male, for a start," he answered, turning his face away and noting the slow reduction of the flames by the limited heat. "I'm gay, Fullmetal."

Silence. Silence ran coldly between them. The fire burnt itself out and he knew they had been thrown into darkness. At least the new fire rising on Roy's face was hidden. He knew he didn't exactly fit the stereotype, but who said he had to? Who said that he had to 'camp it up', so to speak, like Garfiel in Rush Valley? He was allowed to rise through the ranks and still be himself. There were no rules saying that gay men and women couldn't serve in the military, and he wasn't exactly the most secretive. After all, he had been caught kissing a man last year outside Central Command. Fullmetal had no right to discriminate against him for his sexuality, and he would burn him if he tried. "Oh." Another string of silence ran between them and he could feel the shorty's eyes on him. "Well, that doesn't help." He frowned and turned back to the younger. "Who cares if you like dick? I asked for your type, Colonel. Gender doesn't count." Roy burst out laughing and closed his eyes again.

"I was not expecting that, Fullmetal," he laughed before smiling in his direction. "Well, tall is a start. I don't know," he said, turning away to avoid any judging stares. "I guess I like not being the powerful one sometimes. Who knows? But tall is my type. I like longer hair, too, it's fun to play with. And..." he trailed off, beginning to realise he'd started to described Fullmetal himself.  _Well, if the Captain wasn't lying about his height._ "Anyway, what does it matter? Let's see this creation of yours, I can tell the fire's gone out."

"Oh, right," Fullmetal answered, clearly having gotten distracted from his actual purpose out here. "Yeah, just step forward a little and, uh... touch away, I guess. It might be a little warm, it is made of metal and there was a fire on it but-"

"I can handle a little heat," Roy interrupted, stepping forward and kneeling to put his hands out. He felt the edge of the warm metal and moved his hands in, feeling dips and bumps. He took his hands off and frowned, shuffling closer and focusing on how the dips and rises were formed. There were two long clusters of bumps surrounded by dips, so he focused on them. He frowned deeper as he started to recognise the shapes, then he froze before understanding that it was two people stood side by side. "Is this...?"

"Us," Fullmetal answered, stood still where he had been before. "I wanted to make a reminder for you that you could still recognise without sight. I made me short," he laughed stepping closer and tentatively guiding Roy's hands to one of the figures. "And I put you in your uniform. I didn't know you were a Brigadier General so there aren't enough stars on your shoulder, but I think I did okay." The shorty rested his hands against Roy's as he guided one to the shoulder of the taller figure. "It took me a good month to get your face right, though, so it might not- Colonel?" He felt a tear roll down his cheek and gritted his teeth at the idea of showing any weakness in front of his former subordinate - or anyone, for that matter. "I'm sorry, is it not... I'm sorry if I've upset you, Colonel, I didn't mean to... I-"

"It's perfect," Roy interrupted, pulling his hands away and wiping his face. "It's perfect, thank you. I just... I think this is one of the nicest things anyone's done for me in years. What happened to the days of your rudeness in the office?" he laughed to relieve the tension, putting his hands back over Fullmetal's creation and smiling thinly. "Fullmetal, thank you. It means a lot."

"Why did you never take Marcoh's offer?" the shorty asked quietly, and Roy froze, his smile cold on his face.

"I guess you rubbed off on me a little."

"What?"

"I couldn't bring myself to sacrifice human souls. Not for my sake. Not when my goal is to unite Ishvallans again, together and with Amestris as a whole. I couldn't use their people for selfish gain with Marcoh's stone. Being blind isn't so bad."

"But-"

"It led to this."

"But I thought you wanted to see?"

"I don't need my eyes to see you right now."

A moment of silence hovered over them before Roy realised what he'd said and felt the blood rush to his face.  _Idiot. Why can't I just keep my mouth shut?_ He closed his eyes and dropped his head forward, gritting his teeth as he waited for the rejection he knew was coming. He could just picture the Captain's reaction when he told her.  _'What were you thinking, Sir? That's a child you've let yourself be attracted to. He's seventeen years old.'_ He opened his eyes again and lifted his face, relaxing his muscles and feeling the cool air brushing over him. He might as well face it like a man. At least he can expect the rejection, rather than last time he'd fallen for a man and was expecting reciprocation. It's better to expect heartbreak than have it come as a shock. He noticed that silence still ran between them and turned his face in the direction he thought Fullmetal was standing. He pushed himself to his feet and smiled thinly. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that. I'll go back to the Captain and-"

"Winry's not my type because I'm gay too."

He froze. More silence. Barely any space between them. Roy focused on the sound of the breeze whistling through the tiny gap between their bodies and felt his face turning red again. He couldn't remember the last time he'd blushed, but this would definitely go down in history books, if only as the day he developed obvious feelings for a teenager. His only saving grace was the darkness of the field they were stood in and the fact that Fullmetal couldn't see the fire blazing in his cheeks. He bit his lip and clicked his fingers, throwing a burst of flame through the clear air to his right with a frustrated shout. "You're seventeen, Fullmetal," he said, after a few moments of tense quiet. "I can't... I..." He stopped himself and dropped his head along with his hand, raising the other to his face as he felt his eyes beginning to get heavy before he closed them. "You're seventeen."

"That doesn't mean I don't know what I want," he answered, the low voice still sending shivers down Roy's spine. What had happened to the short, immature child he'd saved Amestris with? When did he turn into... this? "It doesn't mean I don't know what I want, Colonel. I can decide that for myself. I know what I want. I know... I know who I want." He felt a warm hand against his shoulder and his breath caught in his throat. "I'm not a child, Colonel, I'm-"

"Please stop calling me Colonel," he interrupted, breathing heavily as he lifted a hand to rest against the one still resting against him. "I'm not a Colonel anymore, and I don't-"

"You don't want to be the powerful one all the time."

He opened his eyes and lifted his face again, turning towards him. "You're seventeen, Fullmetal. As much as I want this, I can't. You're seventeen."

The formerly-automail hand takes its place resting against Roy's right cheeks, pulling an audible gasp out of him before he recollects himself. At this position, he could tell that the shorty was definitely taller and it did things to him he felt guilty about. He gritted his teeth and held his breath as Fullmetal started to talk - quietly and low, not realising what that voice did to him. "Mustang," he said. "Yes, I'm seventeen. But I'm not a child. I've told you that already, and I'll tell you this again: I know who and what I want. I want you." Roy felt his heart starting to race and could already predict the Captain's joking comments that he wasn't acting like the usual professional Brigadier General Roy Mustang. "And besides, if it's your reputation you're worried about, don't. I'm not your subordinate anymore and, you've got to remember: it's not like anyone's going to call you a paedophile. The age of consent in Amestris is fifteen. I'm nearly eighteen. I can legally consent, so listen to me. I want you." Roy swallowed and tried not to focus on the warmth of Fullmetal's hand against his cheek. "And dammit, I hate this. I don't know how you deal with not being able to see people's faces."

Roy instinctively clicked his fingers and held a small flame, struggling to focus on controlling it as he recognised the steady puffs of breath against his neck as Fullmetal moved closer and started to whisper in his ear. "I like it when you're flustered, Mustang."

"Fullmetal-"

"Call me Ed. You'll be screaming it soon enough."

Roy dropped the flame and groaned loudly in frustration, pulling away and turning his back on him. "Ed, then. I can't... you... why are you like this?" He closed his eyes and ran both hands over his face before pushing them through his hair and resting his palms on the back of his neck. "I'm Brigadier General. I have responsibilities. This is the first weekend I've had off in nearly two years and I only came down here to thank you and wish you luck in Creta. I didn't come to visit to seduce you or let you seduce me. I just wanted..." he trailed off and turned back to Fullmetal. "I can't do this."

"I'm not going to make you do anything you don't want to do," he answered after a short silence. "But I don't want you to choose not to just because you feel guilty on my part."

Roy stopped. Was that what he was focusing on? A year ago when he turned down the Captain, his reasoning was that he was gay. A few months later when he turned down a twenty-year-old beginner alchemist, he argued that he couldn't connect properly. Every potential relationship since, he seemed to come up with some sort of excuse why it wouldn't work; he didn't want his authority to influence their decisions, he didn't get on well with them, he 'accidentally' got caught meeting with one of Aunt Chris' girls. Why was he refusing this time? Because he was technically still a teenager, despite the legalities in the country in which he works to enforce the laws? He opened his blank eyes and faced Fullmetal properly, gritting his teeth and taking a step forward. "You're right," he mutters quietly, his voice seeming to echo through the empty field. "I'm just making excuses. I like you, Fullmetal. I just... I can already see the Captain's face. You are technically a teenager."

"I can actually see your face, Mustang, just about, and let me tell you: it's pretty damn kissable," he replied, stepping closer again. Roy took a breath and held it before closing his eyes and letting it go.

"I don't know how you can tell without having done it," he answered with a low voice, resisting the urge to bite his lip as he felt Fullmetal move closer. His hand took up its place again on Roy's cheek and he feels the thumb run across his skin softly.

"Can I?" the younger whispers, his other hand moving to lift his chin slightly.  _Well, he's definitely taller, then._

Roy holds out his hand and feels it press against the material over Fullmetal's chest. He frowns slightly and runs his hand upwards until it meets his hair before he tangles his fingers carefully. "I can't see you, but I wish I could right now," he whispered, finding himself holding his breath again. "You seem like you got damn hot over all this time since I last saw you."

"You can talk," he answered, pulling Roy closer. He felt Fullmetal's lips just millimetres away from his own and he wondered if it was obvious his heart was racing. With his fingers locked in the younger's hair, he pulled him in and inhaled the scent of oil that had come with living in an automail shop as he pressed their lips together. His breathing stopped when he realised he had to lean into him to reach properly, the small height difference affecting him in ways he hadn't thought was possible. He pulled away to catch his breath before locking them together again, felling Fullmetal close his teeth gently over his bottom lip. He opened his mouth ins response and leaned closer only to pull away when their noses clashed, laughing quietly.

"Sorry, it's hard when you can't see," he said, breaking the silence and pulling Fullmetal down by his hair to lean their foreheads together. "The Captain will be wondering where I am. I should go." He pulled away regretfully and noticed the warm grip of the former-shorty's hand around his wrist.

"Are you going to take it?" Fullmetal asks with a low voice, referring to the model he'd made for him.

"The Captain will question it. She's going to town tomorrow, though, you could always come to visit at the hotel and bring it with you."

"I might do that, he responded, pausing before pulling Roy back to quickly and carefully push their lips together before letting him go. "I'll see you tomorrow, Mustang. You can count on it."

 

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's Part 2! I apologise in advance if there are any typos or mistakes, I try to keep track of them and get rid but sometimes it's not always possible. I think that there's something wrong with tenses here but I've given up trying to get them right, so take it as it is, I guess. I hope you enjoy!

Roy stretched out on his bed, wearing as few clothes as he could get away with in the scorching summer heat. Somehow the country was hotter than the city, even at the same time of year. Although to be fair, Resembool is close to the deserts of Ishval, where the weather is even less forgiving, so he could count himself lucky. Roy groaned as he stretched a muscle and felt the scratch of paper left on the sheets. Paper, of all things. He picks up the sheet and drops it on the floor as the Captain paces in stress around the room. He sighs. "No, Captain, I don't need you around. Go meet whoever it was in town like you planned." He knew he wasn't acting as professional as she was used to, but this was the first break he'd had in forever and he'd be damned if he wasn't going to enjoy it. He threw his arms over his head and felt them drop against the - thankfully - cool pillows. He swore that no matter how much Fullmetal begged, he was not going to light a fire. He'd rather die than add to this heat, and if the experience was accurate, the odds of that happening around the former alchemist were quite high.

"Well, Sir, I'll return later to take you to the train station," she replied, a thin smile playing in his mind at her tone of voice. He sat up as he heard the door open and then close, and upon the distinct sound of hinges squeaking shut, he fell back into the sheets and tried to relax, knowing Fullmetal could arrive at any second.  _Maybe I should just turn him away when he gets here,_ he thought to himself, stretching out on his back and sighing at the satisfying click in his shoulders.  _Should I really be encouraging a teenager to come to my hotel room?_ He squeezed his eyes shut and rubbed his hands over his face, ready to pick up the phone and call the Rockbell house when he hears a knock on the door, four solid thumps that immediately send his heart to his throat.

He stands and feels his way to his case where he grabs the first shirt he finds and pulls it over his head, grimacing at the increase in heat. He then makes his way to the door and slides his palm over the surface before finding the handle and using it to pull open the door. "Hello?" he says, trying not to assume it's Fullmetal.  _Maybe he didn't even come. He might've changed his mind, after all, I am a little old for him._ "Who's there?" he continues after a pause, suddenly anxious that he'd answered the door to someone he shouldn't have.

He feels a fist curl in his shirt and a split second later feels the warm press of lips against his. He smiles against them and uses his free hand to weave his fingers in Fullmetal's hair to pull him close. He feels himself being pushed backwards and moves away, letting the younger step past him and smiling at the feel of fingers at his waist as he pushed the door closed. Turning around, he opens his useless eyes and directs his face to where he was used to Fullmetal's being - below his own. "It's nice to see you, Fullmetal," he says with a grin, feeling his breath catch at the low chuckle from the boy -  _no, man_ \- in front of him. "How are you feeling today? Other than hot?"

"If that's supposed to be a line, Colonel, it's a bit rusty," he replied, and Roy felt the blood rushing to his cheeks as he realised what Fullmetal must've thought he'd been insinuating. He groaned and dropped his head with a smile before lifting his face again and attempting to appear less than embarrassed. He wasn't sure how he had this impact on him but his heart was racing harder than it ever had before.

"That too," he replied, grinning at the recognisable swell in Fullmetal's chi - even as a beginner he could notice that. "But I was referring to the weather. It's a lot hotter here than in Central. I only put a shirt on because I knew I was expecting a guest, otherwise, I'd be sat in an ice bath right now." He turned away and felt his way down the wall till he reached the cupboard and opened it. "Do you want-"

"You didn't need to put on a shit on my account, Colonel. I was hoping to take clothes off you, not put them on," Fullmetal interrupted, and Roy froze in his tracks, hand holding open the cupboard beginning to shake slightly in an attempt to keep his cool. "I brought this for you, do you want me to put it somewhere Hawkeye won't find it?" Roy closed the cupboard again and bit his lip. He held his hand out in Fullmetal's direction and felt his fingers skim over cool metal; the corner of his mouth twitched up as he recognised the dips and rises from the previous night. He moved away and started to sweep his feet as he walked towards where his case had been, feeling his foot catch on it and bending down to open it again.

"I'll put it in here," Roy answered, holding his hands out and waiting for Fullmetal to put his creation in them. He didn't expect to feel a hand push his down and recognise the sound of the younger bending down beside him - his automail leg clicking slightly as he knelt. He closed his eyes and leant back on his knees, pausing for a second before pushing himself to his feet and feeling his way to the sink. He grabbed a glass and held it with his forefinger folded over the rim by the knuckle. He twisted the tap. Holding the glass under the slow stream, he waited for his finger to touch cold water before he moved the glass away and cut the stream. "Would you like some water?" he asked as he held the glass to his lips and felt the satisfying flow running down his throat and relieving some of the heat-induced discomfort. 

"I'm alright," Fullmetal answered. Roy choked on a mouthful of water and carefully felt to put the glass on the counter as he noticed the tug of fingers on the material of his jeans. The former alchemist froze for a second as Roy collected himself before continuing, fingers trailing a heated line through the material as they rose to rest with a gentle pull on the belt loops at his hips, the younger now stood in front of him. He felt himself instinctively moving away, only for his breath to catch at the counter digging into his lower back. "Can I kiss you?" Fullmetal asked with a low voice, lips only inches from his face. Roy felt his eyes flutter slightly and closed them in an attempt to avoid giving anything away. 

"If you don't, I'll be annoyed," he answered, instinctively tilting his head up at the memory of the kiss they'd shared the night before - Fullmetal was taller than him, after all. He smiled in hidden anxiety as he felt warm fingers rest against his face and move to tangle in his hair. "Sorry if my hair is..." he trailed off, gritting his teeth. "It's hard to do when I'm blind and I refuse to ask the Captain to help with something like-" He gasped in shock as the fingers in his hair tugged gently before he bit his lip and tried to control himself. 

"You're... uh... You're beautiful, Colonel, so shut-"

"Brigadier General. And don't call me that if you're about to kiss me, Fullmetal," he interrupted, searching for any high ground he can get. The younger sends shivers down his spine at every action, so the tiniest chance of asserting himself must be taken.

"Don't call me Fullmetal, then. I'm not a State Alchemist anymore," he replied, and Roy felt jealous at his ability to restrain himself as Roy trailed fingers up his chest and across his shoulders before finding his braid resting on them. "Like I told you yesterday: call me Ed. It's just one syllable, nice and easy for you to scream out later." Roy opened his eyes again as his arms rest on Fullmetal's shoulders, hands looping round to pull his braid loose and run his fingers through the locks. "What... what the fuck are you doing?"

Roy paused before he used the new-found leverage to pull him down and whisper in his ear. "I want to be able to pull your hair when you make me come," he answered, revelling in the feeling of Fullmetal's muscles tensing for a moment as he felt a short release of breath against his neck, making him shudder slightly. After a long silence, the younger softly pressed his lips to Roy's jaw, drawing a sharp inhale from him. He peppered gentle kisses down his neck, pushing the material of his shirt aside to close his teeth lightly against his collarbone. Roy squeezed his eyes shut and weaved his fingers tightly in Fullmetal's hair in an effort to restrain himself. His efforts failed when the younger repeated his actions, and he choked on a low moan in reaction to the euphoric feeling that ran through his blood at the sensation. "Ed..." he whispered as the feeling persisted, suddenly feeling a wash of concern. "Ed, wait a second. Wait."

"What's wrong?" he answered quietly, equal concern filling his voice as he pulled away, leaving one hand twisted in the fabric of Roy's shirt and the other pressed lightly against his jaw. "Did I do something... wrong? Did I hurt you?"

"No! No, God, no, not at all," he replied, shaking his head and pulling his face away slightly. "No, I was just worried that... I don't want to hurt  _you_ , Full- I mean, Ed," he corrected himself, feeling the fingers on his face relax. "I mean... well... I'm going to be blunt, here. I'm thirty-two and you're seventeen. I doubt you've had a lot of experience, but I've had plenty. I know... I know what I'm doing and I know how to make you feel good," he continued, dropping his fingers from Fullmetal's hair and resting his hand on his shoulder, tightening his grip on the fabric of his shirt. "But I don't want you to think... to expect... I don't want to make you feel like I expect anything from you. Or that you can't speak up if I do or say something you don't like. I don't want to hurt you, I want you to talk to me. I can't see your reaction to anything so I need you... I want... can you promise me you'll say if-"

"Mustang, I promise I'll moan extra loud for you so you can hear me," Fullmetal interrupted, and Roy bit his lip as he pictured a sarcastic grin playing on the face he could remember from years ago, mentally wincing as he realised that face was a child's. "And I swear on my mother's grave that I'll tell you if you're hurting me in a way I don't want you to." Roy could swear he'd drawn blood at the strength he was biting his lip and forced himself to let go. "But you're right," he continued, the joking tone dropping from his voice. "I have zero experience, so I'm going to be counting on you to teach me everything you know. And you need to tell me what feels good so I can do more of it - you know way more than me about this sort of thing."

Roy sighed and tightened his grip on the younger's shirt before yanking him down and returning the neck kisses. He smiled softly against the expanse of warm golden skin as he heard a restrained gasp from Fullmetal. He closes his teeth around the shell of his ear and pulls gently as he reached for the buttons of the former alchemist's shirt. "Is this okay?" he whispered with a pause, groaning at the kick of hard automail against his shin that comes in response.

"Mustang, shut the fuck up and just..." Fullmetal answers, fingers digging into Roy's waist at the scratch of teeth against his neck. "Shut up and get on with it. I barely slept thinking about this."

"I kept you awake?" Roy mumbles into his neck, pressing hot open-mouthed kisses against him. He repressed a smirk when an almost-silent whine left Fullmetal's throat in response. "Well, if I didn't have to go back to Central tonight, I'd be certain to do the same again." He finally found the buttons of his shirt and pulled away to work on them. He felt warm  _flesh_ hands creeping along his hips and running across his back under his shirt as his useless eyes gazed blindly ahead. With the buttons finally undone, he slowly pushed the material over Fullmetal's surprisingly-broad shoulders and dug his nails in gently as he wrapped his arms around and pulled his hands against his lower back to pull him closer to his own body.  _If only I had taken Marcoh's offer, maybe then I could've seen how Fullmetal looks without a shirt - as an adult. An adult who will shortly be in my bed._ "You know, I might struggle a little with this," he admits regretfully before his own shirt is pulled over his head and he relishes in the feel of his chest pressed against the younger's. "What with being blind. You may need to, you know, help a little. I can direct you if you need it, Fullmetal."

"Ed. And if you're saying you want me to fuck you into your mattress instead of the other way around, I'm happy to comply," he answers, hooking his fingers under the waistband of Roy's jeans and earning a guilty smile. As much as his title, authority and reputation suggested otherwise, Roy was in favour of giving up his control. He preferred it. But that didn't mean he was willing to admit it easily, especially to Fullmetal of all people.

"Please," he answers quietly, feeling an embarrassed flush begin to rise on his face. "If you don't mind."

"Well, Mustang," Fullmetal leant down to whisper into his ear, sending shivers down the spine he'd been running his fingers over. "I'm under the impression that your ass, while it looks gorgeous in those jeans, would be even better stretching around my cock." Roy choked out a groan as he felt teeth against his neck, staring out into the now-comfortable blackness as he was pushed backwards, the backs of his knees hitting the mattress of the bed. He fell onto the sheets and waited for the younger to join him, hooking his fingers in the material beneath him as he crawled backwards and eventually hit the headboard.  _Fuck_ , he thought to himself.  _He's seventeen, where the fuck did he learn to talk like that?_

He felt fingers curl around his ankles and pull on them, stretching his legs until he found himself lying down and spread out. He recognised blood rushing to his face as he ignored the embarrassment running through him at the realisation he was submitting to his former subordinate. "Edward..." he called out after a long pause. "I wish I could see you," he whispered, closing his eyes as he tried to picture what the younger might look like. He flinched at the image of a young face in his mind. "I can only remember your child's face." The mattress sank either side of him and he felt a weight on his legs; Fullmetal had straddled his waist and was running warm hands over his chest.

"I'm no child, Mustang," comes the reply, accompanied by a thumb brushing over Roy's left nipple and pulling a strangled gasp out of him. "I'm perfectly capable of fucking you speechless. What do you want?" He opened his eyes again and gritted his teeth against the darkness and the repeated assault on his chest. After a brief pause, he fails to restrain a loud moan as Fullmetal grinds their hips together. "I asked you a question, Mustang. Don't make me repeat it." Another grind left Roy's head pushing back into the sheets as he managed to hold back another expression of his satisfaction.

"I want..." He trailed off as he bit his lip, feeling blood rush south as well as to his face. All his prior conquests had failed to make him feel safe enough to give up his control. But this man sat on his hips? He'd trust him with his life. He'd give up the world to him. He bit his lip harder at the thought.  _Since when did he matter that much to me?_ "I want..."

"Spit it out, Mustang."

He laughed a little as the weight on his legs reduced a little. "I want to feel..." he sighed and closed his eyes against the uncontrollable sense of humiliation that started to run through him. He'd never been good at saying what he wanted. "I want to feel... powerless," he muttered, swallowing his words and gritting his teeth against the silence that followed. More silence. He could almost taste the shock in the air between them, as little as the space was.

"Powerless?" Fullmetal repeated, confusion raising the pitch of his voice.

Roy flinched as he unintentionally ground his teeth and attempted to relax his jaw. "I want you, Ed," he said slightly louder. "And I want you to have... have power... over me. I want... I need you to take away my power."

"You kinky fucker." He felt the mattress sink again as low chuckles filled the silence.

"What?" he frowned, not expecting that response.

"You want me to take away your power? You want me to control you, Mustang. All those years of trying to keep me on a leash, of making me a dog of the military. You were my C.O., and now... you want  _me_ to control  _you_. You kinky fucker," he declared, laughing and leaning back on his knees, relieving the pressure on Roy's crotch. "You want me to tie you up, too? Spank you?" He felt Fullmetal lean forward and press his lips to his collarbone before whispering against his neck. "Or do you just... you know, do you want to be told what to do? Do you want me to tell you what to do, Mustang?"

"That's... uh..." Roy coughs, certain that Edward could boil the milk he hates so much from the heat in his face. "Yeah, do that, I guess." He lets a thin smile accompany his words, hoping it hides the embarrassment. 

"Ah, of course," the younger mutters, moving down and trailing a line of whisper-soft kisses down the column of his neck and moving to his chest, circling a nipple before latching on. Roy groans in response, feeling his flush fall as the blood rushes further south. Fullmetal chuckles against his skin. "I can take away your power if you want, Mustang, but you've got to listen to me if I tell you to do something." Roy feels himself nodding emphatically and hears another laugh as the younger directs his attention to the other nipple and draws a sharp inhale from the man under his lips. Roy lifts a hand and curls his fingers in the golden hair tickling his ribs. The assault on his chest stops suddenly as he feels a strong grip around his wrist. "Ah, ah, ah." He swallows as he feels his arousal swelling in his stomach. "No touching, Mustang. And for that matter, no moving. Stay still for me and maybe I'll give you a treat."

"What's the treat?" Roy asks with a smile.

" _If_ you can be good for me, and if you do what you're told," he begins, giving Roy a few seconds to choke out a garbled moan as he feels lips trailing over his scars and down his stomach. "I might just let you come. If you're good." Roy squeezed his eyes shut and attempts to remain still as the zipper on his jeans is addressed.  _If I'm good._

* * *

 

A comfortable silence stretches between them as Fullmetal collapses on the sheets beside him, heaving breathing imitating Roy's own. The silence seems to echo louder than the intermingled moans and gasps that had filled the room only moments before, and Roy smiles at the feel of the not-so-short body pressed against his side, cool automail relieving his right leg from the heat the rest of his body was feeling. His thoughts are as blank as the view of the world he is used to, the post-orgasmic bliss numbing his senses. He can feel the slow cooling of the air that fills the space as he notices the time that must have passed since the Captain had left. An hour, maybe two?  _She'll be back soon,_ he thinks, closing his eyes as he tries to steady his breathing, shifting closer to the man beside him.  _But I don't want him to go just yet._ He turns his face to the right and sighs against the feel of soft hair under his cheek.  _Damn it, Fullmetal, why don't I want you to go? Why do I care this much?_

"You know, I'm glad you do, Roy," he heard whispered into the air hanging over both their faces. "Cuz I don't want to go either. And yes," he continues as Roy feels him turn his face to push their foreheads together lightly. "You did say that out loud. Guess I must've fucked you pretty well for you to lose control of your fucking internal monologue." He felt his cheeks burning as laughter was breathed against his face, contentment shocking him at the level of comfort he felt, lying there still splattered with his own come.  _I should really get up before-_

"Oh, God!" The Captain's shock and disgusted exclamation send him into a flustered panic, shooting up and pulling the sheets to cover him and Fullmetal. "I am so sorry, Sir. I knocked and there wasn't an answer, so I cam in and..." He heard the former alchemist shaking with laughter beside him as frustration racked through him at the realisation that he had just been seen fully nude by the woman he'd rejected only a year ago - besides the man he'd just had sex with. 

"Captain," he gritted his teeth, staring out into the darkness and attempting to regain his composure enough to seem to have authority. "If you wouldn't mind leaving us for a few minutes-"

"Of course, Sir. I'll just... I'll just be... outside... nice to see you again, Edward."

The door clicked shut as she left and Roy threw himself back against the pillows, an arm resting over his face as he groaned in frustration. The man in question was choking on laughter. He tried to restrain himself but eventually felt the frustration fading away as he dropped his arm and smiled in response to the suffocating man beside him. "I mean, that wasn't how I meant to explain it to her, but... I guess the rabbit's out the hat, now," he declares, ignoring the noticeable croak in his voice - Fullmetal had held true on his promise to make him scream his name; that alone had shocked Roy, as he'd never been the vocal partner in bed.

"Do you want to join me in the shower?" Edward finally replied after gathering his lungs that he'd choked out.

"I'd love to," Roy replied, facing towards the door and chuckling at the expression he could picture had been on the Captain's face. "I'd love to."


End file.
